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                                           Episode 120.   Jos and I are now approaching 30 years old

 

You may have gathered that at this stage it was apparent that neither of us had thoughts of marrying, someone else that is! Jos had not found anyone likely to enthusiastically take to his obsessions and I was certainly not going out of my way to find someone for him. I didn’t seem to be attractive to the opposite sex and, like many nurses, didn’t have the time to actively search for a male partner. I wasn’t that sure that I didn’t prefer female company anyway, especially if they happily put up with my rather dominant tendencies, as Lucy did, for instance. I resolved that if I stayed at home, took an active part in Jos’s bizarre activities, which I have to admit, I quite enjoyed, I would have a stable background and a nice home for as long as I wished. As a result, I have lived in the same house all my life – quite unusual in this modern age. Any way, this following is what I wrote at that time.

 

 

Ten years after Jos left school, there was a re-union of his contemporaries held in the town and following that, Jos and about a dozen of his school friends held an informal party together with girl friends, some wives and a sister! ....Me!

Jos said he didn’t have time for girl friends and got some strange looks, I expect.

Most of us at the party therefore were about the same age and knew each other quite well. As was becoming not unusual, some of the girls mistook me for Jos’s wife but were soon disabused by others who knew us of old. During the evening the conversation turned to what people ought to have accomplished by the age of 30, which we were all now rapidly approaching.

 

It started off with which books one ought to have read. Most of those propounded I hadn’t even heard of, never mind read. Then one girl said that one should have had one’s first novel published! In the inevitable silence following that sort of statement in a party like ours, Jos jumped in and, to my embarrassment, said that his sister, me - Kate, would now doubt accomplish that for a start. The only writing I had done was this account and of course that was what he had in mind. I blushed like mad and everyone assumed it was just modesty on my part as I had to make up a story about a technical nursing thesis that I was working on.

 

Being a typical small Norfolk town, lots of the girls thought they should be married by 30 and this led to more lively discussion about who was on the shelf and so on. The intellectual tone deteriorated as the drinks flowed and following such things as driving a Ferrari, sexual adventures eventually came up for the list. To sleep with two girls at once – Jos was uncommitted on this. Eventually one chap, not my brother this time, stated he thought one should have made love to a black woman! This brought things to another impasse – with all the American air force camps in that part of the world, none of the girls there was going to risk commenting on that!

 

Jos and I discussed the subject later at home. Supposing, he said, following the black woman episode, he had suggested that one should have made love to a woman in a mackintosh? White, that is! White woman or white mackintosh?, I asked. Needless to say, he had an answer. Either a white woman in a black mackintosh or a black woman in a white mackintosh! Either way, what would they have said? I could imagine and was thankful he didn’t suggest it for the list.

We thought that 30 years old was too early an age for that sort of list, living out in the sticks as we did. Anyway, as Jos said, we were not yet completely ga-ga. If we thought 30 was too young, was 40 years old too late for the marker? Yes.

Jos eventually started drawing up a list of what we should accomplish by 33, and a much more suitable age. (Nowadays called a 'bucket-list', we gather)

Marriage didn’t feature on it!  Our father had just died and Jos had inherited the business and really hadn’t got time for that sort of thing. Nor the inclination.........................Nor had I.

Right at the end of the list, which included reading not only Dickens and Hardy but also George Eliot and Anthony Trollope!, he drew a line and returned to his favourite subject.

I was to bring my account of our mackintosh activities up to date. Written in the style of George Eliot I asked?

 But Ok, I agreed.

After much thought and discussion, he added the following.

(i)  We would discard the old gas-masks which we didn't get down from the loft that often anyway..............Agreed although Jos said he might get a new one for himself (which he did later on).

(ii)  I was to help him acquire a much better nice shiny black rubber outfit, the German SS officer of my fantasies, boots and all. (and perhaps a similar one for myself)..........Agreed.(especiallly the latter!).

(iii)  I was to acquire an overall tight fitting black rubber suit, really tight and really overall. He had seen such in photos – which he got from his Midland friend, Steven, I was told......................Well, if he insisted and paid for it himself, then Agreed.

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